Why “You Complete Me” is Total Bull$h!+


Don’t believe it. It’s crap. Absolute crap.

Let me save you the trouble. Nobody holds the key to you being “complete”…whatever that means. The desire to use another person to fill something in you that is missing is dangerous behavior. You are only setting yourself up for disappointment.

Note: if you’re into the whole dominatrix thing, no judgment. That’s your business. That’s not what I’m talking about here. I’m talking about effectively relinquishing control of your life to something outside of you in order to define yourself.

This is a HUGE problem. It’s not just a theme we find in “romantic” relationships. This is something that many people apply to several aspects of theirs lives. If it’s not the significant other, it their children. If it’s not the children, it’s the luxury home. If it’s not the luxury home, it’s the wardrobe. If it’s not the wardrobe, it’s the job title…and so on and so on.

As long as you’re looking outside of yourself for the next piece, you will always be at a loss. Why? Because there will always be something else you can acquire. It’s an endless pursuit. Besides, anything that is outside of yourself can be taken away from you at any time. Then what?

You aren’t looking for completion. What you want is wholeness.

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Wholeness is something that comes from within. It’s an individual state. It’s a gift you give yourself.

Wholeness is being comfortable in your own skin. It’s knowing that you are taken care of. It’s about following your intuition and living your truth. It’s about alignment with your soul’s purpose. It’s about integrity.

Have you been chasing completion or creating wholeness? What things are you allowing to fill you right now? What sort of things have you struggled with in the past? How did you get past them? Leave a comment. This is a conversation worth having.

7 Soulmate Secrets – Thursday, Feb 21st

urlFebruary is undoubtedly the month of love. A couple of days before Valentine’s Day and people are getting ready for romance…and major disappointment. It’s been years since I felt the angst of another impending February 14th and no one to share it with. It has been years since I somehow felt that I was worth less if I didn’t receive some sort of acknowledgement.

And that’s not because I met the love of my life…most of my Valentine’s Days of the last decade have been spent by my damn self. And now that there is a special someone, I can verify that my interest in February 14th hasn’t changed.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s a beautiful thing to celebrate love – but it doesn’t belong to one day. Instead of the standard show of love on the designated day, I’m much more interested in sustaining a spiritual partnership that fills me consistently. I’m interested in the growth that it presents. I’m interested in the practice of love, not the imagery of it all.

This month in the 360SOUL sessions, I’ll be presenting “What’s Keeping Your Soulmate Away: 7 Reasons You’re Alone (even if you’re in a relationship).” Join me on Thursday, February 21st, 8pm EST for this free tele-seminar when we look at love from a spiritual standpoint. Really, the only standpoint that matters. Happy Valentine’s Day. ❤

How to Capture Love

Heart-on-top-of-stones1How can you possibly capture love with words? It’s impossible but I just had to attempt it. Especially after my last post, I had to do something to remove the aftertaste of the sometimes bitter life experiences. I had to remind myself about the goodness that life has to offer…a bird’s song, a first kiss, a mother’s hug, a best friend’s encouragement. I had to immerse myself in thinking about love

Fortunately, Aspire magazine was looking for articles about love so I submitted this piece, “What is Love?” As I was writing, I found that it basically wrote itself. It was an outpouring of Divinity that was begging to be expressed. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did while writing, remembering, willfully submerging…


Love: One Size Does Not Fit All

I will have way more to say on this topic in a future post, however I will post this short video touching on the subject. I’m in the midst of doing a Video Challenge where participants are to produce a video everyday (weekday) for at least three weeks. This is the fourth video I’ve put out since joining the challenge earlier this week.

What do you think about how people define love?